HUGE SMILE

You know last year if you would have asked me about my life I would have said something like this "it's good...it's ok...you know this and that really sucks..."oh and then the complaining would just start to roll off my lips. This year, deep breathe! It is amazing that it brings me to tears. Not amazing because I have lots of stuff or that I am in the "in-crowd" (I'm not) it is amazing because it is truly full of love from God and joy from my Savior. He has changed my heart. Last year did suck in many ways but in those somethings it was amazing because my circumstances lead me closer and deep to God.

I stepped out and fell off the side of a cliff. When I landed I saw that I was safe. I was in God's arms. They were the arms of his people. These beautiful people that grace me with there friendships, love, compassion, forgiveness and sorrow. I love it. When I think of them I can not help but pray, and get choked up and I get a HUGE SMILE. My whole life I would have to say I was not a crier. I am now. I will see my deep friend at church or drive to her house just for a few moments to say hi and get choked up. I can only say that God has changed me. He has touched me deeper than I can explain and here I am safe in His arms, in the arms of his people.

There is so much to praise God for in my life. Some may see my family and say "wow" such hardship, and they would be right. I look at my family and say "thank you God for trusting me and working on me and them so that we can life in the fullness of your grace!" This does not mean that I never feel lonely. I do. I still do to this day. But I know now my loneliness is not because I do not have it is because I am shut out to draw near to my God. To feel his touch and hear His whispers. In those moments I feel complete. I am excited about what God is doing in my life and I feel so incredible loved.

HUGE SMILE !